Lackhoney

11.14.20 //

my favorite song ive ever made.

it was an unexciting saturday morning in my south florida suburb. id spent the majority of my life moving around but this specific street had been around for enough years to start to feel like home. if youd had live footage of my street at 6:00 am, youd see a series of peaceful front lawns and one with a flurry of movement. a little guy (me) excitedly shoving every last household item into my car as i prepped myself for the 14 hour drive to nashville.

months before, i received what i had interpreted as a series of divine signs to take a chance on myself. id saved up some money that i hoped would sustain me for the following year. i was going to go after music full time for the first time ever.

id arranged to stay in a friends spare bedroom for cheap. my plan was to deliver food a few hours each day and work on music the rest of the time.

i promised my parents that if i didnt make it big in a year, id move back home and take up my career as an airline pilot that id put on hold for music. i didnt think id have to, id always believed so deeply in my ability to make shit shake. 


the next 12 months were some of the most blissful and painful months of my life.

the best moments: i made music with people id looked up to for years, made huge strides towards finding an audience, and found a new community in web3.

the worst moments: a lot of shame, feeling like id disappointed the people closest to me, spending nights paralyzed unable to figure out my next steps.

on month 11, i was processing the impending reality that despite all my progress and work i wouldnt be able to make my 1 year deadline. 

i had to readjust. 

[lyrics]

i thought id be famous by the time november came and i was nowhere
hard for me to justify another year of falling, i caught no air

but i jumped off the edge
and its hard for me to save face in front of my parents friends
hold me im coming down
jumped off the edge
and this regular life shits got me upside down
will you stay with me?
im readjusting.

i was never pretty boy, hard boy, or a sad one
the whole time, i was scared to fit in clichs
my family waiting for me to come back home
being a golden child or disappointments all i know
graduated, good grades and a good school 
couldve made 100k but refused to
im never trying to do some shit that i dont love
my daddy said im childish and its not enough

jumped off the edge
and its hard for me to save face in front of my parents friends
hold me im coming down
jumped off the edge
and this regular life shits got me upside down
will you stay with me?
im readjusting.

[credits]

written/recorded/mixed/mastered by me

co-produced by me and beep (my best friend)

art by me, photo by trent