There Used To Be Four

Hi, I'm Rosalie and this is my very first solo NFT  And what better way to introduce myself than with a song that is one of my most personal. 

I lost my dad in 2016, and that's when I learned that grief is the hardest emotion of them all. Grief comes in waves, and you're forced to find a new path forward. My dad was a brilliant photographer, so this song is about crawling onto the floor and watching a slide show of his photos to remember how things used to be. I felt like he never really got to live his dream of being an artist, which is perhaps one of the many reasons why I am looking to live my dreams of being one. The album cover features one of my absolute favorite photos of his - one he took of the Pantheon - which is also name-checked in the song. The cover also features his handwriting which we were able to scrape from samples of his past writing.

Being the photographer that he was, my dad video-taped our entire childhood. I produced most of this song in my childhood bedroom during quarantine, and knew that I wanted to incorporate footage from his home videos into the song. I combed through about 40 hours worth of footage and barely scratched the surface. So the sounds you hear woven into the experimental soundscape are me as a little girl and my family. I shed so many tears making this song, but I also feel like I got to know me as a child - and love myself more - through watching all of that footage. So this song was healing in that way. 

It just hit me that it's kind of funny to be releasing my first NFT using so much VHS footage, but that kind of feels right in some way too. There's 44 versions of this NFT, which also feels right given the name of the song. As a gift, I'd love to offer 1:1 calls with all collectors and an invite to be founding members of a little community where I'm going to be sharing my plans for upcoming releases, projects, and brainstorming sessions. I'd love to have you be a part of things. 

Sending you so much love. 

Here are the lyrics:

Verse
Hardwood, soft face
Childhood safe space
Kodak pictures, white wall
Photographer's daughter
Falling salt water
Staring through the eyes of my father

Pre
Setting sun beyond the sea
Pantheon, Italy
Loudest laugh Ive ever seen
Smile like a movie scene

Chorus
All I needed was
To remember what
It felt like before
Now theres just three of us
Trying to find meaning cause
There used to be four

Verse
That five-year-old didnt know
When her dad was gonna go
How it felt to see a heart rate fall

Pre
Setting sun beyond the sea
Pantheon,Italy
Loudest laugh Ive ever seen
Smile like a movie scene
Capturing family
Protecting memories
Its all coming back to me

Chorus
All I needed was
To remember what
It felt like before
Now theres just three of us
Trying to find meaning cause
There used to be four

Produced & written by Rosalie